It's A Migraine Morning

Woke up EARLY with a pounding headache. It might be directly caused from my boredom that sent me to bed so early last night and had me sleeping almost 9 hours. But then again, the more likely cause of my extended sleep and having a migraine is the loverly PMS that I am lucky enough to still get to experience each month. Although... you realize don't you... we both got cheated last month because of my face. Did you know steroid shots can make all that monthly stuff go away? I didn't. Until last month.

I was at my parent's house yesterday doing laundry and keeping their cats company while my parents are out traveling the world. While I was there, I wandered into their living area and sat down in a chair to pet Maggie.

A solid black Maggie showed up a little over 3 years ago while I was still living at that house. I called her Mama because it looked as if she were nursing some kittens somewhere. When I moved, Mama stayed, and my mom eventually brought her in and gave her a home and re-named her Maggie. And now we all know where I get my cat fancying from, although my mom will deny this.

I happened to glance over and saw this book called '90 Minutes In Heaven'. I picked it up and started reading.

I told myself when I first started this blog that I would never talk about religion. There are several reasons for this. The main one being, people are funny about what they believe in, and I don't mean funny ha-ha. I find the closed minded-ness of most Christians (MOST, not ALL) stifling. The whole, it's OUR way or NO way attitude is probably the most un-Christian thing I've ever witnessed. I was told as a young child one Sunday morning during my Baptist Sunday school that if I did not attend church, I was going to hell. Period, end of story. At the time, neither of my parents attended church and all my 12 year old mind could comprehend was that my parents did not go to church and my mom is nicer than some of YOU people and there's no WAY she's going to hell. I knew they were wrong.

Over the too many years since, I've had the chance to study several different religions. Far from all of them, though. In a very brief amount of time I quickly discovered that it doesn't matter what you call your God... your higher power... it all comes down to the same darn thing. The ending. What happens when we die. Where we go when we die. And most all of them will tell you that "this" way is the "only" way to get "there".

So you may be wondering what it is that this crazy cat lady believes in. Or not. And I really don't think in the amount of time that this post will be written that I could fully list, or make you understand, the what and the why I believe the things that I do. It's like, a hundred different posts or more to probably make anyone understand... including myself. But I will give you a few insights... just because I know you are too curious for me not to. I just feel like breaking the rules this morning and yes, it's because of that book that I randomly picked up yesterday.

I am NOT an atheist. I believe in a higher power. I was raised to call that higher power God and I still do to this day and will refer to him/her/it as such in this post.

I believe God put into motion, life. I have seen with my own eyes the scientific evidence of evolution in animals and plants alike. We had dinosaurs. We had cro-magnon man and lots and lots of evidence of animals and plants since that time and before. My personal theory, and one that I have never seen written in any book, is that God set into motion life and from that, evolution happened and here we all are. I'm still not sure about the whole evolving from fish theory, though. And I'm not so sure that life started here on what we call Earth. In my mind, it is not so far-fetched to wonder if life started in another universe and landed here somehow.

Skipping ahead a few years...(ha ha) I believe there was a man named Jesus... or what modern times and language translates into Jesus. I believe Jesus was a great man, a wise man, a kind and generous man. I think Jesus knew what life was supposed to be all about. Kindness, generosity, love, happiness, family, equality for ALL people no matter their color, race, or monetary status. And I believe this is why he was persecuted. I think he was spreading this love and a lot of people started jumping on board with what he was saying and the guys (The Romans?) with the power (The money?) got pissed and said, "Well... we'll just see about THAT!" I believe he was able to spread his beliefs to enough people, that he became "famous" enough to be written about by a whole lot of other people.

I believe that no matter what religion you follow, you are not in the wrong, unless you believe your religion is telling you to kill or hate other people for believing differently than you.

You may be saying at this point, "But crazy cat lady! What about the miracles that are written in the Bible about Jesus?" Well... I don't dispute what is written in the Bible. But I also know that there are things in the Bible that have been lost or misconstrued during translation. I believe that no matter the things that were written about then, there's just more to this story than what even the most scholarly can tell us. I believe there is more to life and death then our tiny human minds can even begin to comprehend and stories are told through the eyes of the one who writes them.

There have been too many people who have been pronounced dead and who come back from that death to tell of their experience with most stories being (coincidentally???) similar. There have been too many people who have claimed to have seen UFO's, also (coincidentally???) similar. I am one of those people. There are too many people who have claimed to have seen a ghost. There are too many people who recount stories of experiences of things that are impossible to explain with what we know as "real". Why do we only use half our brain? What would happen if we used ALL of it? How does one begin to explain idiot savants?

In a nut shell... I believe life, and death, is far more than what meets the eyes. I believe that when my living body dies, there is another journey ahead of me. I believe that if you live your life through kindness and generosity, that kindness and generosity will surround you. I also believe that if you cheat and lie and are generally a mean person, that this is what you will be surrounded by. I believe that if there were just one rule we all should live by, it should be: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. And even then, you'll have the sadists to worry about.

I don't have the answer to the big question. Why are we here? The simple and undeniable fact is, we just are. I think if we close our minds to the sheer magnitude of all that is possible, not just what we know to be real, we are cheating ourselves out of a big part of what it means to be here at all.

This post is WAY longer than I intended when I started and doesn't even begin to explain where I really stand on things and why. Again, I think it would take a lot of blog posts to explain myself fully and I seriously doubt I would have any readers left if I were to try, that is, if I have any left after writing what I just did, which really wasn't that much.

Walk in love. Plant a seed and watch the miracle of life first hand. Look at your children and see the miracle of life first hand. Be at peace with your life and everything that has sucked, because it's all part of the journey. It's okay to be sad when we lose a loved one, no matter how they are lost. Just remember how wonderfully glorious it was to get to experience the love in the first place and be thankful that you will carry that love the rest of your days.

I don't have a headache any more. I think I'll go finish that book now.

Peace!