Miracles Of Life

I believe the world shows us every day miracles if we learn to slow down and recognize these small gifts. It doesn't take a keen eye or a college education. All it takes is a mindset to see the gifts for what they are. They can be as small as the bulbs you put out now turning into flowers in the Spring, or they can be as big as the birth of a child. Recognizing that life is cruel, unfair, and much too short-term is easy. The hard part for many is seeing between the lines of the bad stuff that life throws our way.

I've recently had some major life pitches come my way. With the death of my friend came the gift of getting to say good-bye to her hours before she passed away. I know I have mentioned this many times this month. I promise this is the last time I say anything about it this month... seeing as how tomorrow is December 1st and all. Christy and I didn't talk every day. We didn't even talk every week... or every month. She and I had not talked via phone for about 6 months, with just a few emails in between, when she did call. Every time we talked, it was like it had just been a day or so since the last time we spoke. Yes, there was some major stuff happening in her life at the time when she called... but we talked about several things that had happened, any number of which could have prompted her to call me. So I consider this one a biggie.

I'm very selective in my friends. I don't have many but where I lack in quantity my few friends soar high with quality. Losing one, though, puts a severe dent in the balance of my soul. Nothing will ever replace that exact balance. Losing people you love does that to you. As the balance shifts, though, you learn to compensate and eventually you find that you have gotten used to the feel of things... and life spins on.

Just when I started to try and learn my new balancing act, I received another gift. A friend that I had not spoken to in about 9 years contacted me. She and I once worked together and when we were together, we would laugh until we peed our pants... well... I did. Just a little. We hit a point in our lives where we went very different directions with roads that ended up being traveled by us both. Turns out, we're both in a place in our lives where happiness is reality, laughter is common and love is abundant. We spent an hour and half catching up on the phone last night. It was wonderful and I believe I know where I will be taking a vacation in the near future.

So the balance has shifted again. No, it will never be the same as it once was... but it is much more close to what it was a month ago. And that's what friends do. They balance you. True friends never forget you. No matter distance or time.

Maybe Next Year

So I totally blew NoBloPoMo for this year. I just don't know if it's possible to blog every single day for a month. I envy those who have so much to say. If I had more to do then tear up my walls and talk to my cats, I might have more to say... which makes me even more grateful for those that follow this blog regularly. I wouldn't blame you for going away. Some days I wish I could go away... if only for a week or two.

Thanksgiving included an hour and a half wait in line at Luby's, food, and a nap. My daughter and I decided to postpone the movie Twilight for later. We were both tired from staying up late the night before while we went cruising and ran from the cops (what a rush!). The friend's house I was going to go to ended up not panning out either. So I spent a quiet evening listening to Christmas music and I retired early to bed. My family doesn't know it yet, but we WILL be having thanksgiving at my house next year. The thought of having them over all squished together, no where to eat, cats all in everyone's lap shedding fur in the stuffing, just gives me goosebumps!

I hope your turkey day was fantastic and that you got to spend lots of time with family and/or friends, I hope the food was to your liking and that you ate like it was your last meal, and I hope that when you laid down to sleep, as you took flight into dreamland, your day ended with a smile.

HAPPY TURKEY DAY!

I'm halfway through the day so far. Got to come home and chill for a bit before deciding what to do next.

Luby's was fun, as always. We stood in line for an hour and a half until we were able to start loading our trays. My kidos had a previous engagement with the other half of their family and they had to skip out on us before we were even through the line. We weren't anticipating having to wait like we did. But there was plenty of seating. I THINK my daughter is coming back over so we can go see the movie Twilight, but those plans are still somewhat in the air at this point. Now I think I'll kick my feet up, enjoy the great temperature, and maybe take a nap until the massive amount of food I just ingested settles a bit. I haven't eaten so much at one time since last Thanksgiving.

Here's some pictures from my day so far:

WAITING

THESE HANDS HAVE LIVED ALMOST 105 YEARS

SILLY NIECE WITH COOL NEW HAIR

SISTER IN LAW AND BROTHER

MOM AND DAD

ON THE WAY HOME

STILL DRIVING

WATCHING FOR TRAINS

LOVE ALL THE FALL COLORS

THERE'S MY HOUSE

PULLING INTO THE DRIVE

LIBBY AT THE WINDOW WAITING

SPAZZ AT THE OTHER WINDOW... WAITING

Thanksgiving Eve

While many of you are looking forward to eating turkey tomorrow, I will be looking forward to having Luby's Cafateria. Any time I go to Luby's, I have fish. I've never cooked a Thanksgiving dinner. I think I've only cooked a turkey one time in my entire life. Several years ago, my family and I discoved taking the whole family to meet up at Luby's was a VERY easy way for everyone to get out of having the stress of cooking a big meal and having tons of people over. There's always plenty of food and chairs for whoever shows up. I think my mom sometimes feels guilty about this since she was always the Thanksgiving dinner provider, but I love doing this. She got a wild hair last year and canceled Luby's at the last minute and went ahead and cooked. This past year, though, she's suffered with degenerative arthritus in her back and hip area and there's just no way she'll be able to entertain like she used to. One of these years... maybe next year or the year after, I would like do Thanksgiving here for my family. Yeah, it's small, but how fun would it be to have my whole family crammed into my teeny home? (If my mom is reading this, she's cringing right now.)

My daughter is going to come over after work this evening and is spending the night. Tomorrow we will all meet at Luby's around noon. We'll eat, drink tea, and be merry. Then my kids will leave for thanksgiving at their dad's and my parents and brother's family will leave to go camping. I think I am going to a friend's house later in the evening, but I will find out for sure today. Should be a laughter filled day with family, friends, good wishes, and promises to get together again at Christmas.

I hope your day will be just as special...

Every Girl's Wish

So about my whole weight loss journey... yeah... I've been very disappointed on how I've been doing. Didn't give a November update because I was just so put out on how my numbers looked. I feel as if I've been doing the same things I was doing in the beginning, but I was gaining again. A week and half into November, I had put back on almost everything I had taken off. I did not understand what I was doing wrong. I had even been using my nifty new treadmill. But to no avail. The weirdest part of all? My clothes were still as baggy and saggy as ever. I couldn't figure out where the weight WAS. I wondered if I was gaining in other places. I have been pretty bummed about it.

I had a friend come over last night. It's tradition that when he comes over, he steps on my scale. He came out of the weigh room and laughed and said my scale was so wrong. I laughed thinking he was making the typical fat person joke. My friend is in very good shape and we were able to figure out the scale was off about 40 pounds. So when I aquire a new scale, I will commence with the updates. I am feeling much better about things.

Here are some early morning pictures for you, and yes, I did miss posting yesterday and the only excuse I have is that I just plain forgot. Oh well... maybe next year.

The Peacekeeper

I have always been somewhat of a peacekeeper. I have found myself between quarreling parties in the past and when asked for advice, my most common words are: give the person the benefit of the doubt.

Along with my peacekeeping role, I'm also a die hard non-confrontational-ist, which means I avoid conflict like I would the plague. I don't have a problem getting along with almost everyone, but if there is someone who has wronged me, I avoid, avoid, avoid, and then learn to live with whatever the problem is and go on about my gumdrop day. If I can get away with not confronting someone, I will find that way.

So I find myself torn. I was just given the address to a YouTube video of a memorial done for my friend Christy who recently passed away. They said this was played at her funeral. I watched it with tissue at hand, expecting it to be painful to watch. I came away extremely angry.

I didn't go into the details of Christy's death before, because in the end, the details don't change the fact that she died. I will give this much away, though. Her husband had packed up and left her about two weeks before her death and about a week before she died she was in the hospital and her husband never once went to see her.

Anyone who knows me knows how I feel about lying, cheating men. I do not tolerate them. I did once, but that's a period of my life I'm long happily past. The night before Christy died, I got to listen to the sordid details of her cheating husband. When I watched the video there were very few pictures without him in it and they should have had the music to a Jewel song playing, not your typical Sara McLaughlin funeral song that is WAY overused, because Jewel was her favorite singer of ALL time.

So here's where I'm torn... do I comment on what a sham that video is or do I just leave it alone? My instincts are to just leave it alone, but my brain is telling me that if I don't stand up for who she was, no one will... and I'm afraid that brain voice is a little louder than the instinctual voice. In fact, the brain voice is telling me to not only leave a YouTube comment, but to leave one on her MySpace page that I'm told will soon be her Memorial Page, as well. What would YOU do? Would you stand up for a deceased loved one, or would you just leave the family in peace and let them grieve in whatever a sham they are grieving in, with that slimball husband acting as a bereaved widower?

I'm seriously asking for advice here, reader. What would you do?

It's Dark In Here

It's not even 6pm and it's dark outside already. I feel as if I'm more aware of time the older I get. Part of the reason I don't sleep a lot. Time, time, time... tick, tick, ticking.

Looking forward to my extra days off this week. It's nice that it falls in with Thanksgiving. I'm also looking forward to seeing all of my family. Seems like it's been a long time.

I have nothing to blog about people!

The song currently located in my nifty song area is by the Weepies. My new favorite band. I lerv them. They make my ears smile.

I don't even have any good photos to put up, so here's a very old one. This is me and Spazz when Spazz was barely a year old.

Trouble In Browser Land

I'm a Firefox browser user. Or I was. Here the last week or so, seems as if I just can't get anything to load while using Firefox. I had a couple of comments on a recent post that I tried to publish and they disappeared, so if you left a comment and don't see it, that's the reason why. I'm currently using IE now. The type is different and everything looks weird and it makes me wonder what my blog looks like on YOUR page because it sure looks weird in my IE page.

It's 12:45 in the AM and I just got back from the QT down the street. I was needing some cream for the coffee I'm really going to want in the cold morning and thought I'd get it tonight instead of having to get out in freezing morning air. When I was coming back I got followed by da fuzz. I sneezed about halfway home and I think he caught sight of my car jerking violently. I don't sneeze lightly. I've seen people sneeze delicatley and even stifle their sneezes by holding their noses. My head would seriously explode if I tried to do that. When I sneeze, I SNEEZE! My daughter has one of those delicate sneezes with a cute high pitched ah-choo sound. Mine sound as if my lungs are going to come out and hit you in the face. Needless to say, when I sneeze while I'm driving, my whole car is affected. I got home without incident, though.

Winter blew in yesterday morning. Everyone is getting cuddely around here... by the fire, with each other, ALL over me. Cricket has her Winter fluffy back.

Sleep? Me?

I have worked night shift since 1990. (minus 4 years at a job that was M-F 8-5) My reasons for working night shift in the beginning were my kids. Since I was afforded the convenience of living with my parents after my divorce, my parents were there to oversee my little angels at night while I was at work. I would get home, ship them off to school and sleep until I went and picked them up from school. My body got accustomed to sleeping very little, even though I was often tired. I did this for 11 years before I decided to get a day job.

I don't think I ever got used to working days. I would sleep about 4 hours a night and be up around 2 or 3am every morning. I finally went to the doctor and was prescribed sleeping pills. I fell asleep faster, still got up after 4 hours, and felt icky because of the pills. I only took about a weeks worth before I got tired of feeling icky after I woke up and also since they weren't helping me sleep any longer.

There are many days where I could probably sleep longer if I tried hard enough. But I've developed a sense of wasting time as I've gotten older. I feel like if I sleep longer than, say, 6 hours, I'm wasting my entire day. I rarely sleep longer than 5 and normally average around 4 and a half. Day or night.

I had a 7 hour marathon sleep last night. Stayed up till my normal 130am time, went to bed, got up around 6am for a bathroom break and decided I could probably lie down for a few more minutes. Those few minutes lasted till about 830 this morning.

With the extra sleep, I'm hoping to get a lot done today. I need to make the time to mow my yard once more before Winter really sets in. I need to finish up that corner so I can move on to the next. I need to do so much...

One thing I have learned by living on my own... it's sure a lot easier to get things like yard work done when you have someone sharing the chore with you. And it's a lot more fun, too. And it's a lot easier putting that chore off when it's only you that depends on it getting done. If I had to name just one downside to living by myself, this would be it.

It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like...

... the C word. You know... that time of year that's only 36 days away. Lots of decorations up around the area... I think I saw my first house with a lit up tree a couple of weeks ago. I do no decorating for the season until after Thanksgiving. I've done it as early as the day after Thanksgiving, and have waited till the week of Christmas, but never before the turkey day. Lots of people do... I think more nowadays then when I was younger. Last year I didn't even bother until the last minute, then I only decorated my fake ficus. I can only speculate the reasons why someone would decorate so early. If you are an early decorator for the Holidays, I am curious as to the reasons and would love to hear from you.

I was pondering my handiwork so far on the corner I've been leisurely working on. The last major room makeover I did (not counting my daughters room since all I did was paint) was in my other house, and I chose the dining room/kitchen area. I started that project about the same time of year as I've started this one. Granted, that was a pretty big project and I can't tell you how many months it took me to finish. There were certain circumstances involved which is why it took so long to complete, but before I started I got this same intense need to change things up a bit... more so than just moving the furniture around. And like that time, this is a definitive 'need to' kind thing as opposed to a 'want to' kind of thing. Just not sure where it's coming from or why it seems to hit around this time each year.

I'm thinking maybe a small live tree this year... as opposed to my giant fake tree, and my fake ficus.

Tuesday Morning Suckhour

So traffic was disgusting on the way home. More so than usual. Had to take a different way and I don't know that it was any better than it would have been had I gone my regular way. When I leave work and am about to get on the highway I am lucky enough to have one of those TxDoT electronic signs I can see before I actually get ON the highway. This enables me to find another route home in case there is an accident on my usual way home. This morning they were saying all lanes closed. This morning I took a detour. Unfortunately, the alternative route that I took also had an accident which had traffic backed up for a while. But at least the lanes were open and moving, albeit a bit slow.

I finally made it home and put on my coffee and when I went to get a cup, my coffee pot decided that I wanted a lot of coffee grounds in with my morning coffee today. That and to cleanup the overfill because my filter basket spring device that keeps the drips away if you pull out your pot too early (insert bad taste joke here) decided not to work and even though the coffee was done doing it's thing it evidentially was blocked and I had mass coffee spillage (or here). After cleaning up that mess, I decided not to have grounds in my morning coffee and when I tried to filter the coffee already made into my cup with another coffee filter, I made a huge mess and now there's coffee grounds all over my counter as well.

Now I'm done with my one measly cup of coffee and since I'm done with this post, I think I'll go try to make another cup.

I hope your Tuesday morning was a little less sucky than mine.

Spoiled Kitteh And A Libby

I Might Be Getting Days Off

I started out this post by writing about stupid people that call me at work and inconsiderate people on the roads and realized quickly that this would quickly turn into a gripe post. I didn't want to do that so I utilized my delete button. Now, of course, I have nothing to write about.
***
My dead stink is gone!
***
I just got up and let Libby in from the back porch. It's mighty cold for these old bones so I'm not leaving the back door open for them to come and go as they please. I just took off my shoes and socks and I'm barefoot with no slippers around me. My feet hit the kitchen linoleum and I can only imagine what it feels like to bare kitty feet. Since I moved in here, I've wondered on occasion how the wood floors look under the ugly and really bad colored carpet. The kitties tell me they like the carpet just fine... that wood floors are cold and have no traction just like linoleum. Plus, can you imagine the work involved in tearing up carpet and restoring wood floors? Sorry... WAY beyond my lazy factor.
***
I've gotten to a point at work where I need a vacation again. About every other month or so I start to feel antsy. I can take a couple days off and I'm fine for another month and a half. So I put in for it. They ask us not to take off between Thanksgiving and Christmas. I like this rule because I think its a bit inconsiderate to make others work for you when so many of us are scrambling with the holiday shopping, kids being on vacation and specific plans for taking care of them have to be met. So I put in for a Monday and Tuesday of next week... a few days before Thanksgiving and I also put in for December 30th (my special day).

I also abide by another rule. Since where I work is NEVER closed and someone ALWAYS has to be there, we don't get any holidays off unless they fall on our regular days off. If I'm scheduled to work during Christmas or any other holiday, I'm there. If I'm not scheduled, I'm the last person you need to call because I will NOT be there. I think it works out to about every three years at least one of my days off will fall on either Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. There was only one time that I ever called in and that was in the early 90's and I was deathly ill. This year is special, though. This year I have Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and New Year's Eve off. This only happens about every 5 years. Since I always have Thursdays off, I'm always off for Thanksgiving.
***

Happy Sunday. Peace and love and all that...

Just A Saturday

Because I often put off shopping till I absolutely have no other choice but to go, when I actually DO go, I end up spending more than I wanted to, yet everything I buy is something that I really need. Well... almost everything. This applies to the hardware store, the grocery store, the clothing store, etc.

I spent too much at Home Depot, but I got a lot of cool stuff. I didn't have to go to the computer store because Target had a nifty computer mouse that works wonderfully! I probably shouldn't have lingered in the computer section, though. I really have NO idea how that computer game got in my basket! (This excuse was well used when I had children shopping with me. It doesn't hold much weight now and the register clerks look at me weird. But then they start ringing up all my cat groceries and I see them nodding their head in understanding.)

So I tore up more of my wall with my cool new tool. I have a little more destruction left and then I'll start patching. Sitting here looking at ALL the walls, I have a lot of work ahead of me. I can't expect perfection unless I want to install new sheetrock. Since I'm not willing to put that kind of money in a house that's going to be bulldozed once it's sold, I'm seriously considering some kind of mural or random wall art. This giant crack that is now a hole would be a good placement for some faux brick art. I bought some shelving to put my paints on and since my art desk is going to be kept over there anyway, I might art it up some on the wall. This might be good practice for when I grow up and buy my own home.

Not much else going on in my neck of the woods. Is very windy and very cold outside. Good day to sleep in.

No Budget Home Project - Part One

So I decided to paint a couple of weeks ago. Maybe just a few days ago. Can't remember. Anyway... my main purpose in painting is to cover up the cracks and holes in the walls because I'm tired of looking at them. Unfortunately, that involves more than just paint. I am always reading about all these LOW budget home projects, yet my low budget and their low budget ideas are two very different things. Since I have no budget, why not write something for others who want a no budget project to do. I mean... why not, right?

Because I'm lazy, or maybe because I'm a professional procrastinator, and the fact that I tend to start projects and drop them mid production and not feel the least bit guilty about it, the process in which I paint a room may differ than how the professional whatevers do it. Plus, this is no budget so we have to go with what we got folks!

Step one: Gather your necessary tools. No, not the friends you promised to get drunk if they would help you paint. Those things that men have a lot of, and women wish they did. After you've collected your various tools from various locations around the house (mine involved the bathroom, kitchen, bedroom, hall closet, computer desk) set them out to see what you got. I found old spackle, a putty knife, a pointy screwdriver thingy and various other things. I'll want some sand paper as well but it's packed in a box and I'll have to go get that later.
Step two: Stir your old spackle. Mine was really dry. I think. So I added water. And then some more water. A little more. Oh, crap... spackle all over the carpet! Stir your old spackle OUTSIDE. I know you don't want this stuff runny so be careful not to add too much water.

Step three: Move stuff out of the way. Because I still have to live in the room that I'm working on I'll do one section of the room at a time. I'm starting in the southwest corner of my living room. Just because.
Step four: Start working. I'm going to start at the holes where the Kitty Cam once hung out. I still have a few wall anchors I need to dig out of the wall. If you are wondering why all of the holes seem to be dripping, well... for some reason I thought wood glue would cover up the holes. I was terribly wrong. So don't do that.
So I spackled all the holes. I'll go back and do a second layer later to make sure everything is nice and flush. There's this big giant raised crack I need to attend to. It appears to have been patched before... a lot. So now I'm at a point where I need some caulk, a caulk gun, and a wall patch and maybe some wood putty to repairs around my ugly air conditioner. Maybe while I'm at the hardware store I'll find something to cover the ugly air conditioner. I have none of these things around my house. Which goes to show you can start out doing a no budget home repair, but inevitably, it turns into spending of the money.
Part two will happen once the supplies are bought. I have a decent idea of what color I wish to paint things around here, while I'm buying other stuff, I'm going to pick up some paint chips to make the final decision.

I HAVE to get a new mouse today as well. Have I ever mentioned how bad I hate spending money... and shopping?

Mouse, Mice, Meese

I have another whole day of nothingness to do today. I'll be doing things like, clipping coupons, watching movies, napping. So much to look forward to I just don't know where to start.

My mouse (computer type) is dying. And why is it dying and not dieing? I might dye my hair today, but my mouse is dying. Anyway... I've found that when it quits working, I can plug it into one of about 127 other USB ports on my computer and it will work for a little longer. Since I'm doing this frequently, I'm using the ports on the front of my computer. This saves my ass from actually getting up out of my chair. Looks as if a trip to Best Buy is in order. Hopefully no stray computer games end up in my shopping basket while I'm there. Computer mice are cheap. Games are not.

My other rodent smell is fading. Either that or having the window open just really works well. I almost forgot it was there last night. I wonder... is it better that it's cold outside, or would hot weather be worse? Will the cold weather extend the smell for longer, yet not as strong? Would hot weather make it smell worse for a shorter amount of time? What ARE the rules for decomposing, anyway?

I'm thinking about writing a family Christmas letter. Has anyone out there that is reading this, done that before? Are there rules? Do you send these to close family friends as well? Is the point in sending them, to send them to family members you may not see at Christmas, or is it okay to send to those that you will see on Christmas? Should I send one to my ex-husband and his family since the kids will probably be mentioned? I guess I'll go Google it here in a minute, but what do you think reader?

I took this picture last night. I wanted to eat some more watermelon again before I get rid of it and I captured this watermelon monster type thing coming out of my bowl.

Ugh

I guess my blog is just going to be used for stinky countdown this month since a friend of mine said my dead stink would last up to 3 weeks long, unless I wanted to take a sledge hammer to the wall and remove the carcass. Problem is... not really sure it's in the wall. Could be below my feet. Or above my head. Either way, too much work. I have noticed a significant improvement when I have the window open, though. And that's a good thing when it's a decent temperature. I heard a rumor, though, that next week we could experience freezing temps and sleet. I won't be leaving the window open during a freeze.

I've been having mouse problems. Not of the rodent variety this time, but of the computer variety. My mouse will work just fine for a while, then it just quits and I can only make it work again after rebooting. Probably going to have to splurge for a new one soon. Thankfully they aren't expensive. I've checked and reinstalled my drivers, defragged and all of that. Computer guy at work says it's just probably old and ready to go. In our mouse dependent world, I forget all the keyboard shortcuts and get frustrated easily. I can remember a time when computers ran on a keyboard alone.

It's weekend time for me! Looks like it's going to be a very uneventful and quiet one. I'm poor and I got my monthly so I think I'm just going to be lazy for the next two days and do as little as possible, which I'm really, really good at. Yeah, I know... I mentioned the monthly. I'm not sorry. I am taking chocolate donations for the next two days. Or... if you plan on coming and seeing me, best if you bring a peace offering of chocolate. I prefer anything... chocolate bar, chocolate cake, chocolate milkshake... peace offerings are good.

THE DEFINITION OF CONTENTMENT:

Happy Veteran's Day

Dear Dead Thing

Dear dead thing,

I started noticing your presence a day or so ago. I kept thinking I had stepped in cat poo and you made me keep looking at the bottom of my shoes. Today, I realized that YOU were here... somewhere... around the bathroom area since this is where I detect your presence the most... which has caused me to keep my bathroom window open and the door closed. Anyone who has a cat knows how bad cats hate closed doors. This door especially because Jynxy thinks this is where his fresh water is located... in that place that The Mom sits ever so often... and it's not, but you can't tell him that.

I feel bad enough as it is knowing I caused the source of your smell. Before, you were just a cute scratchy thing that I heard romping and rolling up there at all hours of the day and night. I was okay with that, even though you drove my cats crazy. It was when you started chewing on our house that destroyed our co-habitation relationship. I tried to make you stop by banging on the walls and ceiling, but you ignored me like I didn't matter and just kept on chewing away. You left me no choice, really.

So dead thing, I hope that you leave soon. I have to take a shower and I just don't know how well that one small window is going to air out your smell so I'm able to be in there long enough to do that. I can hold my breath long enough to go sit on Jynxy's water bowl and be back out again. But I can't hold my breath while I take a shower. I would fall down and bump my head. So I'm ready for you to leave now. You weren't suppose to be here anyway, you know. The package said you would go away and smell somewhere else. They were wrong. Ooooh soooo wrong.

Heavy On My Mind

It's been 11 days since my friend died. One day for every year that I knew her. I'm still finding the death thing very surreal. I realized I've never had anyone close to me die before. I had a moment the other night where I found out something that she would have LOVED to know about... and it tore me up knowing I'd never be able to share it with her. I'm wondering how many of those kinds of moments I'll eventually have. I believe the only thing that has saved me from completely losing it is the phone conversation we had hours before her death. I will always and forever see that one phone call as a gift.

The consensus is, her death is going to be complications from pneumonia. I don't know for sure if this is what has been printed on her death certificate, but everyone I talk to that has heard about her passing has told me this. I'm okay with that. In the end... it WAS the pneumonia that took her life. But I think if Christy were here to write her own death certificate, I believe she would have written the following:
CAUSE OF DEATH: lies, cheating, broken heart, broken spirit, disappointment, hopelessness, darkness

She and I shared some very dark moments over the years. But in the end, I'm only able to see her smile and hear her laugh. Her tears were buried with her yesterday.

Christy Kopacz Haile Hayes
December 17th, 1967 - October 31st, 2008
She lived to die... she died wanting to live.

I Have No Proof

I carved up my watermelon last night. I took pictures to share with you. I also took some pretty cool pics of the cats. But either my card is all of a sudden bad, or my card reader is feeling spiteful, but one of the two have erased those photos. I've never had that happen before. And I don't know why it happened... like what did I do to make that happen. Or was it just happenstance?

The watermelon was... is... tasty. I chose the right time to pick it this year. Yet I was disappointed. Eating Watermelon in November is just wrong. Even though it was sweet and tasty like it should be, it was just not as good without it being 100 degrees outside. I was surprised by this revelation. I don't know if I will have any more of it.

What Do You Mean We Have A New President?

So I've had a lot of stuff on my mind lately. Lots of questions from my friends and readers about my friend who passed away. Unsure if I want to share with the world the gritty details of her death. I'll decide at a later date.

Someone told me we have a new president. I'm just glad I don't have to hear all the political crap, mud slinging and finger pointing any more. Sure, it's an exciting day in the land of the "free" when we can say we have a black president, but has anyone bothered to note that he is as much white as he is black? And except from a history standpoint, who cares what color he is. Lets just hope he does a good job. It would have been just as exciting to have a female as president, or vice president. I think either way you voted this year, you were voting for change.

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It's past the time for my monthly update on the weight loss. There's a reason for that. I just can't face the scale this month. But never fear. I got a treadmill delivered to my house yesterday. My goals are still very much on my mind.

I've also made the decision to paint my living room. I figured I'm going to at least be here for the next two years, I might as well enjoy the view. Right now I sit and stare at the cracks and ugly white nothingness and it drives me crazy. After that, I'm doing the kitchen. I have an idea about the color in the living room, I know for sure I want the kitchen an interesting yellow color. The dingy white has to go regardless.

I piled all the cat beds on the coffee table and Libby found them and slept in them ALL DAY LONG. I poked her once to make sure she was still breathing. She was.

Fall Colors